This weeks
Article....
The Power of “Liz”
The true influencer in our
choices
I would like you to do
something for me.
Take your left and right
index finger and point them to your head.
The area to point them at is just behind
your ears on each side toward the top of the
ear. Now if you push really really hard….
No, that might hurt and not be good for
you.
But if you could push your
fingers into your head, where the fingers
meet is where “Liz” is.
Who or what is “Liz”? Only
the greatest influencer in our
lives…..
This is the area of the
brain that Neurological Science calls the
“Lizard Brain” or the primitive part of the
brain. It is the part of the brain that is
found in all other species of animals and
reptiles and is still with each of us
today.
The scary thing is “Liz”
may be more in control than you think! Maybe
that thing you did or said the other night
really wasn’t you! Maybe it was
“Liz”!
Here is how this works.
“Liz” is made up of several parts, each with
its own purpose. For simplicity we lump them
together as “Liz”. All the inputs from
outside and inside our body go though
various parts of “Liz” first.
So when we see or hear
something, that signal goes through our
nervous system, to “Liz” and then to the
“Cortex”, the top part of the brain, where
logic and analysis takes place.
“Liz” does not think, but
rather reacts to inputs. This is the Fight
or Flight part of the brain and runs on raw
emotion without logic. Most of the time we
are not aware of how “Liz” is reacting until
our body has already responded!
This is where a knee jerk
reaction or a blush comes from. “Liz” is
reacting and the cortex has not yet taken
control. Scientists indicate there is about
a quarter of a second delay between “Liz”
and the Cortex. This delay is enough for our
body to react in ways we may not always want
it to.
So what has this got to do
with me as a salesperson, manager or
parent?
Everything! Especially if
we want to persuade or influence
others.
Here are several quick
points to consider:
-
“Liz” holds
all our emotions, experiences and
prejudices.
-
“Liz” is
reactionary and acts based on emotions
rather than logic.
-
“Liz” tries to
protect us from the environment based on
past experiences.
-
“Liz” acts
without us consciously knowing it until our
body responds.
-
“Liz” has a
dramatic influence on our decisions and
choices.
-
“Liz” can be
programmed if you work at it.
-
“Liz” is a big
part of intuition.
Ok, are you feeling good
about this or not so good about this? This
is a good moment to be very aware of your
feelings and thinking. It will give you
insight into how “Liz” is influencing you!
It’s that little voice in the back of your
head that we generally ignore.
So how can we use “Liz”
more to our advantage, especially in
persuasion?
-
Understand
that most decisions and choices people make
are not all logic. “Liz” is under the
surface influencing this choice. So
understanding the “Emotional” part of the
decision maker becomes very important.
Remember, the decision maker may not even
be aware of how “Liz” is influencing them.
Your ability to questions and uncover the
emotional hot buttons will give you
insight. ie Using the
4th & 5th level
questions helps to uncover these clues.
-
Because “Liz”
picks up inputs from the environment and
reads subtleties that the Cortex does not,
we need to be aware of our own body
language and motions. An unconscious body
movement or look can be interrupted by
“Liz” and change the entire interaction.
ie
As a young boy he was often hit by a raised
hand. In your enthusiastic presentation you
repeatedly raise your hand in a similar
manner. His “Liz” ducks and is fearful and
angry, no sale here.
-
If “Liz” is
uncomfortable or sensing danger or fear in
anyway, the chances of a positive choice
are remote. We have to address any
potential fears or resistance up front so
“Liz” can relax and not go into “Fight or
Flight” response. If you’re getting a NO
and the proposal is a no-brainer in favor
of the client, you’re probably up against
some fear from “Liz”. ie The fear
of loss is a far greater motivator than the
promise of gain. This loss can be Ego,
comfort, stability, change etc.
-
The idea of
first impressions is highly controlled by
“Liz” and past experiences. Liking someone
or disliking someone is many times
determined at an unconscious level and can
not be explained by the other party. “For
some reason I just did not like him.” “For
some reason I just really feel comfortable
with her.” Here “Liz” has taken in some
subtle input and influenced the
outcome. ie
Prejudice such as “fat people are dumb”
“blondes are ditzy” “I hate
green”.
-
Because “Liz”
reacts to fear the more you can reduce this
fear the more receptive the person becomes.
The clearer expectations are understood and
clearly stated the less fear there is.
Setting clear expectations for both parties
goes a long way in doing this. ie you can
expect these 3 things from us. We also
expect these items from you as our
customer.
-
To understand
“Liz” and get her on your side requires a
total focus on the other person. Look for
subtle changes and language when certain
words or questions are posed. Listening and
observation are key in getting insight into
how their “Liz” is reacting.
If you can be more aware
of your own “Liz” it will help you to
understand this influence in
others.
For more on this I would
recommend Kevin Hogan’s new book
The Secret Language of
Business
or The Psychology of
Persuasion
. Also Emotional
Intelligence by Daniel
Goleman.
The real key is to be
aware that logic is not the key component in
our decision making. “Liz” is always
present.
Till next week, Listen,
Listen and Listen some more!
Harlan Goerger, National
Director of Training
© Harlan Goerger,
4-2008
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